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Friday 20 January 2017

Some of my phobias - you might be interested!

Hey Guys and gals!

So what am I scared of in real life I hear you say? (Either that or I'm hearing voices in my head)

I have 3 main phobias; (other than spiders), and I understand that others may have these too - if you do, give me a shout!

I will try and explain why I don't like / am afraid of these things, and you can learn a little about me in the process!

These fears can also be seriously elevated when my general anxiety levels are high (I suffer with GAD) so sometimes I can deal with the fear - and other times I will just wither up and cry like a baby.

***TRIGGER WARNING FOR MASKLOPHOBIA / COULROPHOBIA, GLOBOPHOBIA AND EMETOPHOBIA***


1. Masklophobia:
The fear of people in masks and costumes such as mascots, full bodied costumed character, masquerade costumes and Halloween Costumes. This phobia is similar to Coulrophobia

I am not sure how long I have had this phobia, and it does vary in degrees. I can sometimes deal with clowns depending on how covered their face is, and whether I know who is under the mask / makeup.

With regards to mascots etc, I just can't go near them. I will cross the road to avoid going near one, I feel like they can smell the fear. I'm not entirely sure where this phobia came from, but I think the idea of a genderless entity of which I don't know what it looks like etc really frightens me.

Strangely enough though, I enjoy events like Comicon where a LOT of people dress up, but I guess I can see someone's face, and can register that somehow these people are 'safe'.

Let me tell you a story...

About seven or eight years ago myself and Mr Scary Movie Sunday went to a water park in La Pineda, Spain. I was excited and couldn't wait to get in... Until I saw a person in a giant penguin suit lying in wait.

Cue the freakout.

Mr SMS obviously knew about my fear of people in full costume, and tried his best to rescue me, but unfortunately the penguin hunted me down like prey, gripped me REALLY tightly, and forced me to have a picture taken with it.

Afterwards Mr SMS suggested that I go to the little kiosk where the photos are, and I have never seen such a forced smile / grimace of fear in my entire life. Needless to say, I avoided the penguin of doom on the way back out.

Want to know the ironic thing about this fear? I LOVE to dress up. *smh*


2. Globophobia:
The fear of balloons. In some cases, the fear is of balloons in general, while in others the object of fear is the sound produced when balloons pop (phonophobia)

I am pretty sure that my initial fear of balloons started when one popped and scared the sh*t out of me. I guess as well I have a case of phonophobia, I get really angry when there are loud noises which scare me, for example when people shout behind me, or slam on the table. That's a seperate issue though.


This = My reaction

So anyway, back to the balloons.

Picture this:

I'm at a kids party.

All of the children are below 5 years old in age (Therefore, haven't got a concept of fear yet).

There are a lot of balloons which are loose on the floor and filled with helium (the latex ones, not the foil ones because who can afford those?!)

I'm sat in the corner, away from everyone to not draw attention to my sweaty hands and grimace of unease...

And then a child comes up to me.

BALLOON IN HAND.

*Squeak squeak squash squash*

Child: Want a balloon?

Me: GET THAT THING AWAY FROM ME!

Every. Damn. Time.

I can't help it, it's the anticipation of the balloon popping which my poor heart can't deal with. I'm the same when I watch a scary movie. But at least with a movie I can pause it, or shut it off or leave the room without making a scene. Kids aren't like that. They smell the fear but don't understand what it is. They are drawn to it like moths to a flame.  

Needless to say it's a little bit embarrassing when I'm having a really bad panic attack and a nearly thirty-year-old is crying because a child offered them a balloon.

I can't cope when I'm in a warm room with helium filled balloons either - because I don't know if you know this, but if the atmosphere temperature gets to a certain heat, balloons spontanteously combust.

Just typing this at my desk is making me feel queasy.

Poor boing boing.

3. Emetophobia
Extreme fear of vomiting.

***ADDITIONAL TRIGGER WARNING FOR GRAPHIC DESCRIPTION OF THE ACT OF VOMITING***

This is probably the fear of mine that can be the most debilitating and have the most effect on my day to day life.

When I tell people about this fear the most common response is , 'Well, noone likes being sick!'

It's not that I don't like it - the thought of me or another person losing their lunch anywhere near me really messes with my day.

I'm one of the emetephobes who can actually say the trigger words, but when I was younger and people used to talk about 'being sick' or 'throwing up' it would throw me in a panic and I would immediately become nauseous myself. Which in turn would make me panic because I might be sick in front of these people, or they might hear me!

If I am out in public the sheer thought of the embarrassment I would feel after up chucking makes my brain stop working, and I just want to go home. Feeling carsick it awful because there is no escape - I have only had one experience of actually being sick out of a car window (when sober) and let's just say I just wanted the world to swallow me up.

I was on honeymoon with Mr SMS and it was so very very hot. I don't deal with the heat very well at all and let's just say I may have had a touch of heat stroke.

Mr SMS has obviously seen me at my meltdown worst when it comes to this phobia and he was trying desperately to reassure me that I wouldn't be sick. He put the air con on full blast and was trying to soothe me.

When we pulled up to traffic lights, I took my glasses off, I undid my belt and opened the window and let rip. On Sunset Boulevard! 

At this point I was inconsolable, so Mr SMS pulled into the first car park that he could so I could continue to revisit all of the Gatorade I had drank to keep hydrated that day!

This phobia also stops me from enjoying time out with my friends at bars and clubs etc - because normal people like to have alcoholic beverages (I don't drink so that I won't be sick from alcohol consumption) and when my friends start to have more than two or three drinks I avoid them and just want to go home. And if someone utters the words, 'I don't feel very well.' I may as well be made of jelly. 

Mr SMS likes to drink - well he doesn't do it often but when he does he goes waaaay overboard.

Recently he was staying away and he was violently sick and I was torn between panicking listening to him revisiting his dinner (it may have been food poisoning that he had with a hint of too much wine), and trying to not listen to him and stop myself from being sick by pacing round my house.

Bearing in mind this was 2am in the morning.

I contacted one of his friends who was in the vicinity to go and check on him which they did, Mr SMS thought I overreacted, but in my mind he was going to die. Literally I was convinced he was going to make himself so sick that he was going to die. Or he would go to sleep and then choke on his own vomit. It's safe to say that regarding vomit, that was the single worse night of my life. 

Eugh.

I could go on waaaaaaaay more about the fear of vomit, as it comes into my life an awful lot, in ways that you woulld normally not think of - but if you are my friend IRL and you feel ill, please don't be surprised if I run away!

I hope you have enjoyed reading a little bit about me, and if you would like to know more then PLEASE leave me a comment and I shall let you more into the life of Scary Movie Sunday!

And remember,
Have a Scary Movie Sunday!